His Ways Past Finding Out

I lost someone recently. Robert Walker was the son of friends that I had for over 40 years. He was adopted by my friends in 1985; my wife and I were there when they brought him home. My son and Robert practically grew up together until about high school when they went to different high schools and their lives took different paths. There was so much history and so much time spent together, though. For the most part every time we got to see our friends it was like no time had passed at all. 2 weeks ago I got a message that Robert had suffered a stroke; I went to see him and my friends in the hospital here and I could tell it was bad. Within a week Robert had passed away at the age of 32. While it is so difficult to make sense of such a tragedy, I took comfort in something my daughter posted that is about as good a thing to think in such times.

I lost a friend I haven't seen in....... I don't know how long

I still lost a friend today

He was a part of all of my growing years. He and his parents were always there. All the truly pivotal moments, somehow, someway, they were there

I lost a friend today

I keep trying to explain away or downplay my grief because of the distance

But the truth is, I lost a friend today

I keep wondering if my sorrow is because he was so young, or because I feel so much for his parents

But the truth is, I lost a friend today

The truth is, people grow, and move, and start over. It doesn't mean they leave their roots behind

They may not visit each other, or talk on the phone, they may not see each other for years

It doesn't mean they don't love each other

I lost a friend today

There are roots in our lives that never rot. Those roots are often our childhood friends that helped shape us into who we are

I lost a friend today

I lost a friend today and have absolutely no idea how to grieve

How do you grieve through the guilt and regret? How do you grieve through the path your lives took

How do you grieve through the window of childhood memories?

All I know is, through distance and memory and love,

I lost a friend today.

Thank you to my daughter for these wonderful thoughts

Sometimes it's hard and there's nothing to say: we'll keep on going but it's just plain hard sometimes

Pray for my friends and for one another

If we have hope only in this life, we are people to be pitied. Our hope is in the future in the hands of our loving God